Lord forgive me when I whine

Well I've moved again back to Plano where I was living before. Mesquite was another learning battle field. Poverty, divorce & just lots of heartaches.  For the first time I was a little nervous with our surroundings, I've never been in the ghettos before & it kind of makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up.  One of the saddest things I've seen since I've been in Tx.  A mother with 6 beautiful children, no food, no money, no husband, no job and no hope. She tried to end her misery a few weeks ago so she's pretty well at the end of her rope.  The sweet little 2 yr old brought me a book of Jesus & so I read it to her, the next little girl ask us if we had any candy we could give her, the next one said she really liked flavored bottled water so we went to the ghetto grocery store & done some shopping. We walked in & a policeman stood at the door, the windows were all barred up, the pop machines also had bars on them. I think we were the only white people in there & I defintly  felt out of place. People were starring at us. We took a bunch of groceries back to their home so at least they had a nice dinner for that night.  My heart was so heavy as we left I could hardly think & we still had some more sad visits to make, by the time our evening had come to an end I was physically, emotionally & mentally exhausted. I felt guilty to eat my small bowl of soup that night and I could hardly wait to fall into bed. All I could think was Father forgive me when I whine!!! Life sometimes just doesn't seem fair. I tried to put myself in that women's shoes & I could not even think of what I would do if I were in her place. As I knelt that night to say my prayers my heart was so full I could not even speak. We attended another Zone Conference today & it was so uplifting, I certainly needed my cup filled & I got just that. I love these young Sisters & Elders, they have such strong testimonies & oh how they can sing. I almost feel like the roof lifted up 2 inches or so. I met an elder today from London but now his family is in Salt Lake City as I visited with him he put his one leg on his other leg & I could see the bottom of his shoe, it had a great big hole in both of them. I never said anything then but after I went to him & ask him to come out of the chapel for a minute. I said, "Elder would you mind if I took a picture of the bottom of your shoe?" It was so funny to see the look on his face. I seen what it means to wear yourself out in the service of your fellowman. It is very cold here like down to 30 & that's cold for here. He doesn't want to get new ones cause he's going home.  I'm certainly counting my blessings this week. My thought : "One thing I know: The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought & found how to serve"...Albert Schweitzer.  My scripture is Moroni 10:32.  We've been learning a lot about grace.  Have a great tomorrow.  Sister Putnam